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'Plus we're probably more productive now we can keep our hands off each other for longer than ten minutes!I want you to know that you change my life and give me strength – even when things between us were/are hard.The Debrief: Laura* and Oli* have been together for two and a half years and are getting married next summer.Like all couples they've had their ups and downs, but being in a trans relationship brings its own unique complications...'When it came to us actually getting together, she had no idea what to expect in terms of my body,' Oli says.
'As a partner, it's very hard to know what to do when your other half has to interrupt sex because they feel so distressed and alienated by their own body,' she adds.
Straight men who are attracted to us are called “f*ggots” and “h*mos,” and may have their heterosexuality called into question.
Past, present, and future boyfriends, I need to tell you something: If you identify as straight, then you can date trans women. If you are gay, pansexual, omnisexual, or asexual, you can date trans women, and it doesn’t change your identity one little bit unless you want it to, because you know what?
Early on in the relationship, she faced ignorant and intrusive questions from friends, relatives, and even acquaintances, wanting to know 'so are you a lesbian now? ' 'Our relationship is constantly under scrutiny,' she says.
'Friends and family do perhaps take us more seriously as a straight couple since Oli had surgery, but it's unfortunate that trans people are held to such high standards of presenting as their true gender.' Despite the ongoing wait for lower surgery, Oli's chest surgery last year was a major bonding period for them as a couple.